February 21, 2006

This Just in!

Hey everyone,

This just in...

Quench president resigns!

Oh wait, we don't have a president. Or really a formal leadership structure at all.

In fact, we basicly just randomly exist.

Comment here with other random scandals that could never happen to quench (or that could).

14 comments:

wannatakethisoutside said...

Upon about 4 seconds of reflection, I should have included several of the scandalous things you all put on the upcoming "things that are awkward 2" page.

wannatakethisoutside said...

I've always wondered this...

Could someone give a technical definition of the word "grope"?

I mean, it just seems like a word that isn't well-defined in my mind.

Connotations as well as denotations, please.

Also, keep the scandals coming.

aurora said...

There can be no sex scandals...most of us have already slept with each other anyway.

However, I did accidentally grope my roommate (and fellow Quencher) biliousclouds tonight. That was awkward.

prince eric said...

quench community rocked by a lawsuit regarding teacozy's illegal reproduction of Kelseigh's trogdor and flying spaghetti monster dildo/penis cozies!

gromphus said...

Head Baseball Bat ODs On Anabolic Steroids!

Quench-wide Deworming Effort Craps Out 204-Foot Ascarid!

Quench Disbanded Due To Lack Of Sexual Innuendo!

icarus said...

yes, i also call for more sexual innuendo.

or maybe just less incest?
yeah that would be good.

maudite entendante said...

Gromphus dear, as long as there are 214-foot worms, we'll never be at a loss for sexual innuendo. *wiggles eyebrows suggestively*

wannatakethisoutside said...

A literal thinker, I did a google search for your 200 foot worm. I did not find it. Instead, though, I found a worm that can take up to 214 days to mature.

Here it is.

gromphus said...

awww, it's so frickin cute! look at the little worm poo, which is super cool, cause it's dirt! can quench have an official worm? like the way states have birds and shit? And can little cutie-nighty-worm be our official mascot (wormscot? brought out for high occasions of state?)

icarus said...

can i get a shirt that says "cutie-nighty-worm"?

please?

imagineme&you said...

i think that we would also have trouble creating a full-fledged lobbying scandal or engineering significant embezzlement. i think volant's right, we'll have to resort to mass sexual scandal.

tea cozy said...

wtto: to grope (in my mind): to come into manual contact with an erogenous zone of another person without that person's consent.

In normal usage, this word is confined to contact with nipples, genitals, and, for some reason, asses, but I think we can fairly say that if someone is polymorphously perverse and you shake their hand without their consent, you've groped them. Or, you know, if you stroke m.e.'s stilettoes...

;)

maudite entendante said...

Ooh, baby, you always have my consent to stroke my stilettos. ;)

qcmny: the abbreviation for a new cultural-understanding horror flick - "Quebec Meets New York!"

wannatakethisoutside said...

I only like to do things consentually. So are you saying that it's impossible to grope consentually, because then it wouldn't be groping?

I guess I just wish we could open up the definition of "grope" to include more consensual acts.

Because I wanna grope y'all.