December 11, 2005

The Best Medicine

If you have never checked out Something Awful's Fashion S.W.A.T. articles, you are about to experience the pure bliss of laughing until you nearly piss yourself.

Seriously. At first, you giggle; then, you snort; then you just lose it. Basically, they take people's MySpace photos and talk about them. My favourite one to date is this one: the sheer insanity of the situations they invent left me near-herniated. But the comments on comic-book characters were pretty good, too, such as their diatribe on Strange Adventures 201: Animal Man battles "The Mod Gorilla Boss!"

Zack: That is a fucking strange adventure, I'm not going to disagree.

Dr. Thorpe: Yeah, it's not every day that we see a hipster ape grabbing a dude's ass.

Zack: I think he's supposed to be a mobster. He must have escaped from the laziest jail ever. They just paint stripes on the clothes you arrived wearing.

Dr. Thorpe: Yeah, but he's also a mod, for some reason. So not only is he a mob boss ape, but he drives a Vespa and listens to The Jam.

Zack: As someone who knows some Italian people I have to say I am really offended by the stereotypical portrayal of Italians as purple gorillas.

Dr. Thorpe: I know quite a few Italians who just happen to be purple gorillas, but I'm offended that they portray Italian purple gorillas as menacing and violent. And homosexual.

Zack: Well who knows what "A-Man" was doing before the mob gorilla boss had to take care of business. Look at the position the guy is in. It's like he was sledding down a hill, flew into the air, and strayed into the airspace that the gorilla had claimed as his own.

Dr. Thorpe: Check out the look on A-Man's face as that ape grabs his butt. "Friend zone breached!"

Zack: I think A-man is enjoying it based on that blue bulge extending from his midriff.

Dr. Thorpe: Whoa. There are very few things that bulge could be.

Zack: His super suit doesn't have pockets so maybe it's a coin purse or some sort of satchel for his sack lunch.

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